Resurrection

From Cutting for Stone, 2009

by Abraham Verghese

"The world turns on our every action, and our every omission, whether we know it or not."

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No, I do not believe that the world turns around the omission of my contribution to the blogosphere.

My world, however, has turned with force and frenzy. On July 30, I dove happily into the wonders of marriage and step-motherhood. Well, my lovely wedding was on July 30, but my sense of calling to these most important vocations came seven months earlier, when I sat down to have coffee for the first time with my now husband. Life with my family gives me more joy than I knew possible, and I'm only nine months in! I am sure that a few difficult days might be around the corner, but the fountain of possibility for love and happiness has exploded wide open; I cannot wait to see what joys are to come.

One source of joy was born both from my jealousy over the many iPads that surround me and also a mother-in-law full of good reading recommendations: my new Kindle. It's fantastic. Not as fantastic as the new Kindle Fire that was released 6 weeks after I purchased mine, but fantastic nonetheless. (How surprised I was when my husband got me the Kindle Fire for Christmas!) Since cracking open the amazon box, I have finished EIGHT books. Now I'm no math whiz, but an average of a book per week seems pretty dang good. The above quote came from my favorite kindle read so far, Cutting for Stone. I am very thankful to my fabulous mother-in-law for suggesting it to me.

The kindle lets a reader highlight any text, and it automatically stores these citations in a separate document. A.MA.ZING. As all of these nuggets of humor, passion, and wisdom gathered in the "My Clippings" folder, I was reminded of my idea (from 2008) to create a blog based on the writings of other (smarter, funnier, and wiser) people.

So, I guess this rambling about my sweet new family and fun new toy serves as a way to say, "I'm back!" Also, get a kindle; turn your world.

"Plan B"

From Plan B: Further Thoughts on Faith, 2005

by Anne Lamott

"The opposite of faith is not doubt but certainty."

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I read this quote and thought, AMEN!  That is exactly what I have been thinking.  I tried my best to describe this phenomenon in my Andrew Peterson post from last month, but Lamott says it so much better.  I am amazed at her ability to describe concepts so perfectly in so few words.  Maybe if I were a professional writer, then I could do it too, but I am just a amateur blogger.  

SO, mainly I wanted to add this here as a footnote to my earlier post--and to say "Thanks!" to Anne Lamott for working through what she calls "shitty rough drafts" in order create art out of the silly English language.  

If you are a person of faith, but are unsatisfied with the BLACK and WHITE versions of old, you must read Anne Lamott.  

"A Little More"

From Lay It Down,2000

Jennifer Knapp

"What I do I don't want to do and so goes the story."

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This line comes from Romans, but for some reason I recite Jennifer Knapp in my head instead of Paul.  

I mostly think about this in relation to working out / eating healthy (which I know dumbs down the original meaning a bit).  No matter how much I tell myself that being healthy and feeling good about myself really is worth the effort, I can't seem to make it stick.  I have never once regretted spending time at the gym, but when the alarm clock starts singing, I hit the snooze.  I feel no more rested when I finally wake up, I just feel bad for skipping my morning exercise. 

It's hard for me to believe myself when I promise that this try will stick because I have been unsuccessful so many times.  If someone else lied to me as much as I have lied to myself, I wouldn't want that person in my life.  I guess I need to find a way to earn back my own trust--if that makes any sense at all. 

I don't know if Jennifer Knapp (or Paul) makes me feel better or worse.  Partly I think, "Well, at least I am not the only person who gets stuck," but I also think, "If after 2000 years of evolving, humans still find themselves in the same predicaments, what makes me think I can succeed any better than our friends in scripture?"   

I guess all I can do is to keep on trying, while trusting that I need something greater than humanity (which is proven to fail).  If, however, any of you have some magic answers to this age old question, please, share the wisdom. 

"No More Faith"

From Clear to Venus, 2001

Andrew Peterson

This is not another song about the mountains, 

Except about how hard they are to move.

Have you ever stood before them

Like a mustard seed that's waiting for some proof?

I say faith is a burden.

It's a weight to bear,

It's brave and bittersweet.

And hope is hard to hold to, 

Lord I believe; only help my unbelief. 

'Til there's no more faith,

And no more hope.

I'll see your face and Lord I'll know

That only Love remains...

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I love Andrew Peterson's music.  He tells the truth--and doesn't ignore the difficult parts about trying to live a life of faith.  This song is one of my favorites, because it speaks to the harsh reality that believers often experience.  

I often talk about faith as something that isn't absolute.  When I know that something is true beyond a shadow, then it takes no faith to follow.  To me, faith is knowing that even though I could be wrong, I follow nonetheless.  Faith is admiting that I do not have a monopoly on truth, but that the glimpse that I have found in this world makes sense, and I will follow still. 

I was watching TV around Christmas, and came upon a news story about a man who dressed as Santa, drove to his ex-wife's Christmas celebration, and killed several family members before burning the house down.  Later that night, one of the networks decided to re-run the opening ceremonies of the Olympics.  During the introduction of nations, cameras cut to basketball star Yao Ming holding a young boy.  This boy was chosen to walk in the ceremonies because during the earthquakes in China, his school collapsed and he walked back into the rubble and saved two classmates.  

Ever since hearing both of these stories on the same day, I have pondered the width of the spectrum of human capability.  I am brought to tears by stories of love and of hate every day.  I wonder where God is and how he/she can stand this, and I hear him asking back how we can stand it.

Having faith forces us to struggle with these questions.  How can humanity be so greedy, and yet graceful? Am I doing all I should?  Do I really need all of this stuff?  Are we really supposed to give to everyone who asks of us?  What about the people that take advantage of grace and kindness?

Yes, Mr. Peterson, Faith is a burden.  But it is faith that will hold us all until we need it no more. All we can hope for is that one day we will see your face, and the greatest of these will remain--and that is Love. 

Coming Soon!

I'm working on my first real post...check back in 2009.  I'll have something inspiring and somewhat unoriginal for you then.